today me and my folks went to a visitation for one of our neighbours who passed away on thursday morning. we weren't close with him but he and his wife have lived across the street for twenty years. his daughter is about 12 or 13 and although i hardly see her or speak to her when i go, i am so sad for her. he was only 56 and died suddenly. it's so scary to imagine going to bed one night and waking up and someone so close to you is gone. and even when you're not that close to someone that passes away like that it really gets you thinking about your own family and friends. needless to say, today was a rough day. i cried when i hugged his wife and couldn't even bring myself to speak to his daughter. i cannot even imagine what i would do if i lost my father like that.
after the visitation, which i left early because i was having too hard of a time being in the room with the family and friends whose lives have really been touched by my neighbour, i had to go shopping for new trousers. one of my most hated things. i suppose if i could go back to having the body i did when i was 19 i wouldn't mind shopping for trousers so much, but sadly i cannot. i managed to find some at MEXX that are pretty nice, but far too long so i need to find time this week to make a trip to the alteration shop up the road. suppose i should take my jeans there too, they are dragging all over the place!
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on a happier note, tomorrow is my first day at the book store and i'm really looking forward to it. not only will i be making some seriously needed money, i will be keeping busy. i am getting so tired of doing nothing and find that i'm starting to slip back into being really sad about being home. i'm on the verge of going back to saying that coming home was a big mistake... that is still up for debate.
the shops are playing christmas music and decorations are up downtown. i guess they had to go up sooner or later. i just wish that the decorations weren't there to encourage us to buy lots and lots of gifts, but rather just to celebrate the holiday season.
i love christmas and am actually longing for november to end and december to start.
plus, on christmas day i get to break my soda fast! speaking of which, i am doing very well, but had to fight some pretty intense diet pepsi cravings the other day. keith (the friend who is doing the fast with me) and i have yet to set out a firm list of acceptable beverages during the two month period, but i think we're on the same page when it comes to soda water, beer and other such questionable choices.
that's all for today. i'm feeling blughhhhh, and scattered and really really wishing i was where i was last year at this time.
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